Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time. ...
5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. ...
7 . Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
8 . Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. ...
12 . Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you...
14 . Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ...
The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest,
in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. And the winners are:
1. coffee: n. the person upon whom one coughs. ...
3. abdicate: v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. ...
6. negligent: adj. absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown. ...
12. rectitude: n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. pokemon: n. a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. oyster: n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism: n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
One does notice the recurrence of certain themes...
[I'm not quite sure of the actual source of this posting, or the attribution.]
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